For high net worth families, communication is a strategic advantage. Families who cultivate open dialogue and a culture of transparency across generations create resilience that extends beyond financial capital. These families position themselves to make sound decisions, navigate complex dynamics and steward both wealth and legacy with intention.
The Cornerstones of Strong Family Communication
Families who communicate effectively tend to be intentional about fostering clarity, openness and accountability in their interactions. They approach this work with a “win-win” attitude, with a genuine desire for each individual family member to be empowered to lead a happy, healthy, productive life. Rather than relying on secrecy or unspoken power dynamics that erode trust, they commit to transparency and respect.
Client Story: The First Generation Wealth Creator
One of our clients* is a first-generation wealth creator who built significant resources over decades. In his culture, financial matters were traditionally private, and he was reluctant to share details with his children and grandchildren. This created confusion and occasional frustration when he began to share financial capital with his kids by giving them access to lifestyle trusts he created for their benefit. While his children were grateful, the gifts created confusion when they were given without context or guidance. Without communication about the intention or responsibility of the gifts, the father’s well-intended generosity created frustration and division within the family.
Through Matter’s facilitated communication training, the family began holding structured conversations about financial matters, expectations and legacy goals. By shifting from secrecy to transparency over time, they began to build trust and establish a shared framework for decision-making. Today, the original wealth creator is gone but the family collaborates openly, ensuring each generation understands and contributes to the family’s vision.
At the core, honest communication and mutual trust drive success across generations. These principles are explored in our blog, The Value of Investing in Family Culture & Legacy.
Why Transparency and Trust Are Essential
Transparency is the foundation on which trust is built. For families of wealth, it enables collaboration, reinforces shared identity and enhances decision-making. Without transparency, uncertainty and mistrust can undermine even the most carefully designed estate plans, governance structures or planned giving.
Client Story: The Young Tech Entrepreneur
Another client is a tech entrepreneur who achieved substantial wealth by the age of 35. She had no family models for managing wealth, Initially, she felt isolated, uncertain how this newfound wealth would affect her identity, relationships with her parents and siblings, and her children’s future.
With Matter’s support, she developed a sense of comfort and understanding of this new wealth and developed a strategy for her wealth to empower her to share it thoughtfully with loved ones and to continue to invest in further entrepreneurial endeavors. Over time, the family transitioned from reactive conversations about money to proactive planning, building both trust and shared purpose.
This transformation reflects the insights in our post on The Power of Effective Transparency.
Why Human Capital Deserves Equal Investment
Wealth management is a deeply human business. Financial decisions can surface complex emotions, magnify existing tensions and introduce difficult choices with lasting implications. When families focus exclusively on the financial side of wealth, they miss the opportunity to strengthen the relational foundation required to navigate those challenges effectively.
Client Story: The Sibling-Led Family Business
A third client story involves three siblings who inherited a family business after the unexpected passing of their parents. Each sibling had different leadership styles and comfort levels with responsibility, which initially created tension and miscommunication.
Through facilitated sessions with Matter, they learned to communicate expectations clearly, listen actively and respect differing approaches. The family established decision-making protocols and governance structures that balanced responsibility across siblings and their spouses and children. As a result, not only did the business thrive, but the siblings maintained strong personal relationships, ensuring the family prospered along with the business.
At Matter, we recognized more than a decade ago that supporting families holistically, developing human capital alongside financial capital, creates enduring outcomes. Helping families cultivate leadership, communication and healthy dynamics is central to their long-term success.
Lessons from High-Performing Teams
High-performing teams in business provide a useful parallel. Teams thrive when they rely on transparent, respectful and intentional communication. They set clear expectations, listen actively and resolve misunderstandings before they escalate. These practices not only prevent dysfunction but also accelerate performance.
Families can achieve similar outcomes. By holding regular family meetings, employing structured decision-making models, and emphasizing active listening, they create a culture where differences can be discussed productively and decisions can be made collaboratively. For families with significant assets, such practices prevent conflict, support shared decision-making and strengthen unity across generations.
When Communication Is Most Critical
Communication is particularly valuable during pivotal family decisions, including:
- Determining how and when to transition wealth to the next generation
- Defining the family’s vision and purpose for its wealth
- Deciding when and how to share ownership of meaningful family assets, such as vacation properties
- Establishing the role of in-laws and spouses in family governance
- Allocating responsibilities within the family enterprise and wealth management structures
Handled with transparency and respect, they can unify family members and deepen commitment to shared values.
Communication training and facilitation are essential strategies for families who aspire to thrive together and make decisions about their wealth over generations. By embracing openness, transparency and trust, families not only preserve financial wealth but also strengthen their human capital, ensuring that each generation is equipped to carry forward both prosperity and purpose.
*The families profiled in this post are compilations based on Matter client families. All names have been changed and any facts or situations that could lead to client identification have been altered to protect privacy. No compensation has been paid to current or former clients.
About the Author
Luke Jernagan
Luke joined Matter in 2022 after 15 years as a parish priest in the Episcopal Church. He was drawn to our firm for many of the same reasons he is drawn to ministry – his love of helping people celebrate the joys of life – and has deep experience guiding families as they navigate complexities, transitions and opportunities.
As our Director of Family Learning, Luke works with Matter families to strengthen their relationships, communicate effectively, and identify what matters most to them so they can thrive as individuals and together. He also leads the Culture & Learning committee, continuing to design thoughtful content and practices that clients and their teams utilize to continuously learn and evolve.
About Matter Family Office
Founded in 1990, Matter Family Office is an independent multi-family office that empowers ultra-high-net-worth families to achieve long-term success. Through an integrated, personalized approach to wealth management, Matter serves as a strategic partner, guiding 131 families in 34 states to navigate wealth complexities, make informed decisions and build enduring legacies. Learn more at Matter Family Office. Advisory services offered by Matter LLC, dba Matter Family Office, a registered investment adviser.